中西方同志开放程度对比Western Gay VS Chinese Gay

About Openness: Western Gay VS Chinese Gay

Many gay friends keep asking me this question: who are more open, Chinese gay or Western gay? My answer is that they are about the same. Or at least Western gay are not as open as shown in many movies or somewhere else. Rather, Western gay are pretty conservative, I’d say. Of course there are those gay guys who enjoy sleeping around. I did see some social butterflies in pubs and bars in USA. However, the gay community, as a whole, is very much mature.

I suppose most people refer to the sex part when we discuss over the issue of who is more open. Therefore, let’s look at the relation between relationship and sex. My experience tells me that Western gay people are very serious about relationship. It takes a pretty long time for a relationship to establish. Take myself for example. When I was in the States, I had a foreign BF for the first time in my life. He is from Germany and we were together for 1 year or so. We did not have sex until we dated for like one and half a month. We went to the movies, threw parties together and sometimes did some backpacking. We experienced a period of time during which we got to know each other. It was until we figured out who we are that we started to crack the sex code. I still remember our first time took place in a car parked by a peaceful lake in Idaho State. That was great sex, indeed.

When we were in love, we did not meet each day. We had our separate schedules. We often hanged out in bars and spent quality time together in a coffee shop or even read a book together. We had lots of things to do. Once we had a fight, we sat and talked. I like this way. Sadly enough, a lot of Chinese gay couples often have a big information gap. At that point, communication can truly bridge the gap. Having a serious talk is the way out, not fighting. If things can not be worked out, then we have to say good-bye in a friendly way or we can try to separate temporarily for some time and to see what’s next. In a word, Western people have something to offer for us when it comes to the issue of how to handle relationship.


I do not know if my experience is common or simply an exception in Western countries. Yet most gay people I got to know in the States are relatively conservative. Believe it or not, my perception tells me that Chinese gay people are becoming even more open in terms of sex. We always learn something evil from Western society.


By the way, let me tell you another example. Last year, a gay friend from Germany came and visited me. We went to drink in a bar. I was kind of drunk and asked him if he is top or bottom. He was mad at me as he felt it embarrassing to be asked this kind of question. Then from this case you can also tell that gay people in Western countries are not as open as we imagine.

Let’s take the best from all over the world. Let’s have more quality sex and lessen junk sex. Together let’s make the Chinese gay community a better place. We do not get much support from the government and the society and our family. Nevertheless we can be very supportive to each other. We are in the same boat. Do not rock the boat.

[ 本帖最后由 Inn-club 于 2007-7-4 22:11 编辑 ]

原來你對G文化，也那麼有瞭解！

原来你还知道中国的同志

::36:: ::36:: .........这么多```看看好累啊？！

恩.....楼主说的很好.......我对你的文章很有兴趣.....

::56:: ::56:: ::56::

我也有性趣............................::59::

::53:: ::53:: 是真的吗::16:: ::16::

w-gay is open not only sex, but also dey thought!
comparely, our chinese gay only in sex, but not open our thought!
whata pity.

我只是随便写些感想,这几天感冒在家.空着呢.
只是一家之言.大家可以参考.一起探讨

原帖由 小淫 于 2007-7-4 22:12 发表
w-gay is open not only sex, but also dey thought!
comparely, our chinese gay only in sex, but not open our thought!
whata pity.

Hey,man. You've got a point there.
Chinese gay people are not mature mentally.
But they try to be very open in sex.

约公开性:西部同志与中国同志有很多同志朋友不断问我这个问题:谁是更开放, 中国同性恋者还是西方同性恋? 我的答案是,他们对相同的. 或者至少西部同性恋是不开放的表现在许多电影或别处去了. 相反,西方同性恋是蛮保守的,我就会说. 当然,也有一些同性恋男人享受睡左右. 我也看到一些社会蝶酒吧,在美国. 不过,男同性恋者的社会作为一个整体,是非常成熟. 我猜想大多数人指的是性行为的一部分,当我们讨论这个问题的人是更加开放. 因此,让我们看看关系关系和性行为. 我的经验告诉我,西方同性恋人很认真的关系. 这需要一段相当长的时间关系来建立. 以本人为例. 当我在美国时,我有一个外国高炉首次在我的生命. 他是从德国和我们一起为1年左右. 我们并没有发生性关系,直到7月,我们像一个半月. 我们一起去看电影,扔各方聚集在一起,有时做了一些搜寻. 我们经历了时间,在此期间,我们结识对方. 直到我们想通了,我们是谁,我们就开始裂缝性代码. 我还记得我们第一次发生在一辆汽车停在了和平湖达荷州. 这是伟大的性别,确实. 当我们在爱里,我们并没有满足每一天. 我们有一个单独的时间表. 我们经常挂在酒吧和花品质时间在一起,在一家咖啡厅,甚至读一本书 在一起. 我们有很多事情要做. 一旦我们有一个战斗中,我们坐在一边聊天. 我喜欢这种方式. 令人遗憾的是,很多中国同性恋夫妇常常有一个很大的信息差距. 此时,沟通才能真正弥合. 产生严重的谈话是出路,而不是战斗. 如果不能计算出 那我们就要说再见了友好的方式,我们还是可以尝试暂时分开一段时间 并且看看未来. 总之一句话, 西方人有料到,我们说到的一个问题,如何处理关系. 我不知道如果我的经验是共同的或者只是一个例外,在西方国家. 但多数同性恋人,我一定要知道,在美国是比较保守. 信不信由你, 我的感觉告诉我,这是中国同性恋人正变得更开放的性行为. 我们永远学习,从邪恶的西方社会. 碰巧的话,让我告诉你一个例子. 去年,有一个同性恋朋友,从德国前来拜访我. 我们去喝酒,在酒吧. 我是那种喝醉了,并问他是顶部或底部. 他是疯了,在我为他感到尴尬,要问这种问题. 那么,从这次事件中也可以看出同性恋人,在西方国家都没有开放,为我们 可以想象的. 就拿最好来自世界各地. 让我们拥有更多的优质性和减少垃圾的性行为. 让在一起的,使中国同志社区变得更美好. 我们并没有获得多少支持,由政府与社会,我们的家庭. 不过,我们可以十分支持对方的工作. 我们都在同一条船上. 不要自找麻烦.

原帖由 Inn-club 于 2007-7-4 22:15 发表


Hey,man. You've got a point there.
Chinese gay people are not mature mentally.
But they try to be very open in sex.

oh, thks...but call me lil nasty...I like such name..::34:: ::34:: ::34::

原帖由 小淫 于 2007-7-4 22:12 发表
w-gay is open not only sex, but also dey thought!
comparely, our chinese gay only in sex, but not open our thought!
whata pity.

I think so。

On the other hand, we can not simply put the blame on the gay community.
There are lots of reasons contributing to this.
For example, Western society as a whole is more open than China's.
Not only the gay community.
Because the gay community is merely one part of the big society.
The Western society,I'm afraid,is far ahead of us.
It is largely due to their education and economic condition and even the religious belief.

When your parents are supportive to you and even when same-sex marriage is legal,
you,as a gay,do not have to hide.
Everything does not have to happen underground.

You know what.ONE-NIGHT-STAND happens underground.

[ 本帖最后由 Inn-club 于 2007-7-4 22:23 编辑 ]

還好我差不多都能看懂～～

我要練口語，我要練口語～

原帖由 mike 于 2007-7-4 22:29 发表
我要練口語，我要練口語～

Dude,actions speak louder than words.
Go for it

so interesting!
what a big surprise that I can practise english here!

一個人怎麽練？

Are you the only one here who wanna practice English?

If not,go and find them.

They are your partners.

Or go to English corner.

Do sth.
Do not sit there doing nothing

You yourself have to find a way out

原帖由 Guest from 219.82.87.x 于 2007-7-4 23:13 发表
Where is the new English corner? Is it still there?

六公園～～

原帖由 mike 于 2007-7-4 23:15 发表

六公園～～

Sometime I go there

嘿嘿，我小時候去過～～

原帖由 mike 于 2007-7-4 23:19 发表
嘿嘿，我小時候去過～～

How old r u now

我是おじさん，感覺你說話好沉穩，是見過大場麵的人！

[ 本帖最后由 mike 于 2007-7-4 23:22 编辑 ]